Terrible things happen in life - but it is possible to recover from them

We go to all sorts of lengths, often unconsciously, to hide from what has hurt us. But only by attuning to pain can we hope to heal

We can try as hard as we like to build a better life for ourselves and our loved ones, but the truth is that sometimes things happen that are very difficult to recover from. Terrible, traumatising, crushingly painful things. If you are someone who has experienced abuse; lost a loved one too young; lost a baby or a child; wanted a child and not been able to have one for whatever reason; suffered irreparable injury to your body and your mind; or survived any tragedy that has left you drowning in despair, a better life may feel absolutely and irredeemably out of your grasp.

I understand this. I have seen it many times in my consulting room, and although I have been very fortunate in my life, I have also known that feeling of certainty that there are some traumas that you just cannot recover from. When you’re in the middle of it, or stuck in its aftermath, that is all there is.